ABOUT THE STAFF

Josh McClellan (Senior Editor): is not a robot in disguise, but firmly believes that Robocop comes equipped with a turkey baster. The next time you have several hours, ask him why squirrels say "Hello Superman" when spoken to, or about the Mr. Green joke. When he needs to pay the bills, Josh works for the Government.

Adam "The Hammer" Davis (Sophomore Editor): is a one time actor turned Mad Scientist/Mathematician. In his spare time he dabbles in linguistics. Seriously.

Matt Englund (Editor in Absentia): has a collection of awesome tattoos and will show them to you. That is, if you don't suck. He has extensive knowledge of conspiracy theories and about the Masons, and owns a copy of 5/5/2000.

Riannon Clarke (Cool Editor): Once beat a guy to death and molested her cat with a pool cue. She is the expert on all things cool, and if you don't believe me, go fuck yourself.

Nathan Norris (All Things Dismembered Columnist): is also known as the Reverend Thug Life, and will consider presiding over weddings if there's a sacrifice involved.

Tom Dempster (Foreign Affairs Editor): is presently based outside of the United States in Austin, Texas. Tom learns languages like frat boys consume beer. He pretends to be a composer but usually works the corner of Congress and Cesar Chavez on weekends.  And one day, he will probably be teaching your eight-year-old how to play the recorder through a tracheotomy hole.

Liz Fitzpatrick (Science Edtior): is an English Major turned auto mechanic and wields a mean bowling ball (particularly when aimed at:

Randy Pettigrew (god/Cult Leader): Randy is the self proclaimed god of all YAD staff, despite bitter disagreement from the writing staff.)

Cobalt Steele (Man's Man): is a figure of mystery, but is known to have a thing for the ladies, and never goes anywhere without his personal assassin Shark.

Theodore Lancaster (High Priest of Distaste): is perhaps the most offensive man in the world. His ideals of admonishing all right and good in the world pertains to you too, you cum-guzzling steaming pile of horse shit, yeah I said it, Satan is going to pour hot wax in your eyes and then...

Rosalynd Van Dyke (Senior Feminist and Radical Idea Editor): is one of Norway's leading feminist authors. She has a great disdain for American Culture and her husband. And, for some strange reason, Cobalt Steele.

Timothy Brednick (Movie Reviews): is five years old and in kindergaten at an undisclosed school in the north east. His mother won't allow him to review more than one movie a month.

Gaz (letters): is a two-year-old Rottweiler. She hates most of you and will eat anything you leave on the floor.

Rosa (dog): is a three-year-old German Shepherd, but to be honest, no one really cares what she does.

Vaclav Tartoffz (columnist): is from an undisclosed Eastern European country, possibly Slovenia. He emails us his column about three hours before we go to print -- in his native tongue. Whatever it is.